BY: ORANGECHAIR
Approximately six days ago, I was searching through On Demand and became instantly elated and dismayed. The elation: for some reason, that I’m not complaining about, Showtime had put almost every season of every show that the network had created On Demand. Feeling quite like a kid in a candy store, I flipped through all the different shows trying to decide what to watch first. The dismay: the first 4 seasons of Californication were being removed from On Demand on April 3rd. So began my quest to watch four Seasons of Californication in six days. Throughout my quest I got to know the show’s main character, Hank Moody (David Duchovny) quite well. Here is what Hank Moody taught me.
- What I Want To Do (minus the writer’s block): For years my goal has been to become a famous writer. After completing countless blog posts and entering an endless number of short stories in contests with no monetary gain to show for it, I had begun to lose sight of my goal. Watching Moody’s roaming lifestyle reaffirms my life’s goal. I want to be like Hank in the sense that I want to write, meet people and write more. I don’t need to include Hank’s ability to screw-up every aspect of his life and his inability to escape writer’s block.
- Rant: It baffles me when people say they try to avoid ranting. If you begin a rant, one of two things can happen. One: people agree with you and your rant sparks a conversation. Two: people disagree with you and your rant sparks a conversation. Either way, as long as you’re not a complete asshole, you get a conversation out of the rant.
- Friend Fights: How are two friends supposed to fight over something The Hank method seems to work pretty well. A couple minutes of wrestling combined with a few solid punches to the ass (no gay meaning there, just legitimate ass punches) seems to clear up a lot of arguments in Hank’s world.
- The Power of Words: Words are something that you can always use, manipulate and play with to create humor, joy, sorrow or any real emotion. They are a tool that, if used correctly, can get you in or out of any situation. To properly wield words like the weapons they are, one must practice. Play with words, use new words, see what effects different words can have on different people. Knowing that words can be your most powerful weapon is not enough. Like all weapons, your words need to be practiced and honed.
- Listen: Hank Moody is a douchebag, a womanizer and an asshole but he exercises one of the most important skills a person has: listening. No matter how wronged a woman has been by Hank Moody, they always credit him as a man who hears everything. To actually listen and hear what a person has to say allows you to really know that person. Not everybody can do it as well as Moody though.
- God Hates Us All: While we may not all have a Karen (Natascha McElhone), the woman whom Hank endlessly loves and constantly mess up with, or a Mia (Madeline Zima), the sixteen year old that tricked Hank into sleeping with her, the truth behind moody’s book title is universal. God (Buddha, Allah, Zeus, ect.) hates us all, every last tone of us. That being said, stop wallowing in your own misery like you’re the only sad person in the world. God hates us all. We all have some terrible, shitty thing happening so stop thinking you’re the only one. Either accept your miserable fate or pull one over on God and figure out how to be happy.
This six day Californication marathon has been some of the most fun I’ve had watching TV. The show is witty, well written, well acted, wholly entertaining. I give Seasons 1-4 the following
- Season 1: 7 out of 10
- Season2: 8 out of 10
- Season 3: 9 out of 10
- Season 4: 9 out of 10
The show is awesome, though quite raunchy. If you have no problem with sex, drugs, alcohol and profanity then I highly recommend this show.